| hrieking starts when a child feels shortchanged or | | | | conflict, and children will obey the rules knowing they |
| beaten to the child's rocking horse or PlayStation | | | | have to pay for the consequence of their actions. |
| game. Before going on a rampage yourself, take a | | | | Rules over name calling, the use of remote control, |
| deep breath and look at the big picture.Intense sibling | | | | child's rocking horse, and other prized possessions |
| rivalry, if not handled properly, can be an incurable | | | | should be enforced consistently. |
| wart in your children's adult lives. | | | | * Hold family meetings and let the kids join in the |
| Sibling Rivalry | | | | resolution of issues. They'll be more cooperative |
| If you have only one kid, you don't have to endure | | | | knowing they had a say in solution of the problem. |
| the headaches induced by squabbling children. The | | | | * Active participation of both parents in the |
| fights over who gets the bigger slice of the pie, who | | | | resolution of conflict and the consistency of their |
| takes the child's rocking horse to the porch, or gets | | | | participation is a must. |
| the chance to go with mom to the green grocers | | | | * Insist on no-name callings and physical harm. |
| are trivial, but beware of smoldering resentments if | | | | Getting Things Sorted Out |
| you handle the situation inappropriately. | | | | Sibling rivalry extends to the child's gender. If a boy |
| Sibling rivalry is natural. The fighting between brothers | | | | feels that it is unfair for his dad to be lenient with a |
| and sisters is always triggered by jealousy, | | | | sister or if a sister feels that dad does not care |
| competition, and parental favoritism. It may be a | | | | enough to bring her along those fishing jaunts, there |
| simple argument over who gets what first. If you | | | | will be conflict. |
| had the budget, you'd immediately buy each of the | | | | As parents, it is also very difficult to stay impartial. |
| children a PlayStation, child's rocking horse, or a bike | | | | But that's the only way you can foster happy and |
| in the name of household peace and quiet. But what | | | | harmonious relationships between your children. |
| if you don't? | | | | Providing them team activities in carrying out |
| In truth, the rivalry for toys is not about the having | | | | household chores, playing with the child's rocking |
| the toy first. It's getting to the act first or simply an | | | | horse, computer, and train sets can get them |
| annoying ploy to irritate a sibling further. The power | | | | coordinating with each other. |
| struggle in the pecking order can be balanced with | | | | Here are some practical tips to get you by: |
| these tips: | | | | * Do not compare siblings. |
| * Observe your children at play. The sneaky sibling | | | | * Do not be consistently angry with the kids. |
| will start the squabble by bullying another. Usually the | | | | * Give them frequent reminders about the rules. |
| one who is crying his or her lungs out is the | | | | * Set up a schedule for play time and work time. |
| aggrieved party. Instead of venting your ire on the | | | | * Organize more fun activities for the entire family. |
| child, investigate the situation with an open mind. | | | | * Always resolve issues and don't let anger fester |
| * Help the children process their feelings. Talk to | | | | overnight. |
| them and tell them you understand why the child | | | | * Review your attitude about the situation. |
| feels sad, angry, or upset. By acknowledging their | | | | And next time you shop, try getting another child's |
| feelings, you help the child understand that these | | | | rocking horse, dollhouse, or scooter, but explain to |
| feelings are natural and can be resolved. | | | | them they'll have to wait their turn with the toys and |
| * Set up rules and consequences when these are | | | | the stuff they frequently quarrel over. It'll keep sibling |
| violated. When there are rules, it is easier to resolve | | | | rivalry at bay. |