| Bad manners are wearing us down! | | | | When we choose to act impolitely we can't in the |
| A day doesn't go by that I don't overhear some | | | | next breathe turn around and blame everyone else |
| exhausted patron or clerk, grandmother, teacher, | | | | for our churlish society. It stands to reason that if |
| CEO, television judge, or tennis coach exasperated | | | | our complaint is that manners rules are slipping, |
| by the seeming lack of manners witnessed daily. If I | | | | collectively we are allowing our manners to slip. |
| had a dollar for the number of times I have heard, "It | | | | If we are unable or unwilling to see our own |
| is just unbelievable how rude people have become | | | | ill-mannered behavior, and we blame everyone else |
| today!" I'd be loaded. | | | | for our bad-mannered society, how is it possible to |
| I am not just being hypersensitive to people's | | | | turn the ship around? Why not just throw up our |
| complaints because I happen to be an etiquette | | | | hands in defeat and exclaim, "Manners? I haven't time |
| trainer. Quite the contrary, if I internalized all of the | | | | for manners; now step aside while I notify my |
| manners complaints that I receive via email in my role | | | | considerable Facebook network that I don't much |
| as an etiquette expert, I probably would change | | | | care for Mondays." |
| careers...yesterday. Lately, I have just noticed that | | | | Without manners, day to day life would be bedlam. It |
| the general populace believes that bad manners might | | | | would be impossible to leave our homes to purchase |
| be winning the war against civility. | | | | milk if our neighbor could shoot us for our newspaper |
| The amusing contradiction of course is that everyone | | | | or paint our house blue to match his peonies. So as |
| is complaining about other people's manners but | | | | beleaguered as we all are by the stresses of life in |
| nobody seems quite aware of, or willing to, fess up | | | | the twenty first century, we have no choice but to |
| to their own manners gaffs. I include myself in this | | | | practice excellent manners, model good manners and |
| group, and to drive home this point with an example, | | | | teach children etiquette. If we let manners go by the |
| I will crassly throw my own husband under the bus. | | | | wayside it won't take long before we live in chaos. It |
| Just this past weekend, I watched my spouse | | | | is inherently obvious that if just one generation is not |
| repeatedly check his email from his phone while on | | | | taught how to behave politely, then good manners |
| the field coaching our son's flag football team. I was | | | | will quickly disappear. Who will teach etiquette to |
| probably doing something equally as heinous and | | | | children if we don't teach etiquette to children? |
| coarse on the sidelines as I cheekily admonished his | | | | We are shocked, saddened, exhausted and a little |
| bad manners, but darned if I know what it was... | | | | grossed out by (as the title of the brilliant Lynne |
| Well, I blame... | | | | Truss' excellent manners book says), "The Utter |
| The internet, reality television, the government, | | | | Bloody Rudeness of the World Today." But that |
| texting, the football coach, and Facebook, rank high | | | | doesn't mean we throw in the towel, drop into an |
| among some of today's most favorite anti-manners | | | | easy chair, wave a white hanky in the air, and give |
| villains. Were it not for outside forces "making" us | | | | up on manners. If we give up, the "etiquette(ly) |
| behave impolitely, our manners would not be slipping. | | | | challenged" win. |
| Or would they? Do outside influences have an impact | | | | I refuse to live in a world without manners, don't |
| on societal behavior? | | | | you? Be selfish; use good manners, model good |
| Am I a victim of external sway? Have I no choice | | | | manners, and teach children etiquette so that you |
| regarding my own conduct? Do the many pressures | | | | (and I) get to live in a more gracious society. |
| of society demand that I drop the practice of | | | | Now is the time to recommit to a more civilized |
| etiquette and become boorish and uncouth? | | | | culture. Let's declare a war on bad manners by taking |
| Of course not, I am completely responsible for my | | | | note of and improving our own etiquette. Think |
| own actions. Yes, it is true that technology has | | | | about all we would gain if we brought back civility, |
| introduced a new set of manners complexities to | | | | respect, and integrity. A poised, five year old little |
| society, however, I have a responsibility to choose | | | | boy said it best when he quipped, "Use good |
| to be undaunted by today's challenges and continue | | | | manners so you don't make everyone sick and get in |
| to follow basic manners principles, even online when | | | | trouble." Indeed. |
| shrouded by the curtain of internet "anonymity". | | | | |