| -- End Ad Box ---> | | | | fusses over them. They eat when hungry and get |
| Many parents find their toddler’s temper | | | | changed when wet. When irritable, someone picks |
| tantrums bewildering. How is it possible that a | | | | them up. When bored, someone will play with them. |
| once-sweet baby could fall to the floor screaming | | | | Little by little, though, the toddler is growing up. Soon |
| and kicking looking more like a wild animal than their | | | | he’ll be able to roll over and sit up. Before you |
| beautiful baby? How could such behavior be | | | | know it, he’s 18 months old. Things are |
| considered normal? To learn the answers, you need | | | | changing fast. All of a sudden the 'round-the-clock |
| to put yourself in the shoes of both a baby and a | | | | service your toddler has been receiving begins to |
| typical toddler. | | | | slack off. Of course they can't have this continuous |
| Ute Fumeaux, CEO and founder of is a mother of 3, | | | | service all the timein fact he may even have to |
| and has taken it upon herself to read everything she | | | | wait. What's really upsetting is that mum and dad |
| can get her hands on about parenting and takes | | | | now sometimes say, 'No.' In fact sometimes they |
| every opportunity she can to observe mothers and | | | | even get mad at their toddler, and they may even |
| children around her. Ute’s way of explaining | | | | scold him. |
| tantrums is to take a look at what life is like from | | | | As a parent, you can now see how a baby has |
| the perspective of a baby and then from a toddler's | | | | come to expect that he will have his way. You can |
| point of view. | | | | also see that, to a toddler, growing up means |
| For many months, after the baby is born, its parents | | | | receiving less service from his parents and having to |
| have catered to every demand. They knock | | | | wait for needs to be satisfied. All this can be |
| themselves out to keep baby satisfied and | | | | overwhelming for a toddler who not only has these |
| comfortable. Each time baby whimpers, cries, burps | | | | high expectations, but who has not yet developed |
| or passes gas mum or dad, or both parents, are | | | | any self-control or coping skills. So when he is faced |
| there. What a wonderful life! What wonderful service! | | | | with frustration, he often loses it. When the world |
| Two grown-ups catering to baby around the clock. It | | | | doesn't respond to a toddler the way it did when he |
| doesn't matter if it's 3 in the morning or 9 at night. | | | | was a baby, he temporarily goes into a fit of rage. |
| Mum or dad will be there to change a wet diaper or | | | | At this point, he cannot respond to reason. Saying |
| give a bottle. Sometimes, they even rock baby or | | | | something like, 'If you don't stop I will give you |
| sing a song.' | | | | something to cry about,' means nothing to him. |
| Everything just described is absolutely necessary for | | | | Also, you can see why it doesn't make sense to |
| babies. They need this nurturing and attention to | | | | interpret a toddler's temper tantrum as a defiant act |
| survive. They need this service and love so they can | | | | against authority. A toddler in the middle of a tantrum |
| trust that their new world outside the womb is a | | | | is not defying anyone. This child is temporarily out of |
| good place. If a baby learns he can rely on the world | | | | control, a little 'crazy.' He cannot help himself. |
| to help him survive, he has the foundation to develop | | | | As your toddler grows, he experiences one |
| a personality. Babies also need this service and love | | | | frustration after another. |
| so they can fall in love with their parents. You see, | | | | From these experiences, the toddler gradually begins |
| babies have been inside their mother's womb for nine | | | | to develop a tolerance for putting things off and not |
| months. A mother may have fallen in love with her | | | | always having his way. But this takes time. While he |
| baby during this time, but her baby won't fall in love | | | | learns how to tolerate frustration, there will be many |
| with her until after he leaves the womb. This | | | | temper tantrums. Sometimes, the toddler will fall to |
| happens only if mom and dad are there for a baby. | | | | the floor and bang his head. Sometimes, he will pull his |
| Now, let's move on to life from the perspective of | | | | hair and spit. Sometimes he will kick his feet, or |
| the baby as he becomes a toddler. | | | | throw thingsor throw up. All of this is normal...of |
| They feel wonderfully secure with the way everyone | | | | course, it's also trying on parents. |